In a post going viral on social media, a woman using her cancer as an excuse to do what she wants is dividing the internet.
Published on Reddit’s r/AmITheA**hole forum, a teen under the anonymous username u/OrneryEntrepreneur90 shared her story to receive opinions from the “AITA” community. The viral post has over 9,000 upvotes and 600 comments.
The original poster (OP) began her post by explaining her relationship with her second cousin, “Jane.” She wrote that they aren’t close as Jane can sometimes be mean to her.
Since they live in the same city, Jane has joined her in different activities by taking a bus downtown since she’s available. The OP needs to be accompanied by someone as her parents are uncomfortable with her by herself on public transportation as her mother was “often harassed” on a bus when she was young. The OP wrote that she is very grateful for what her cousin does for her.
“Jane was unfortunately diagnosed with cancer recently, and was given an estimate of three years left,” she wrote. “Ever since she received the news, she’s often done things like cutting in long lines, and asking for discounts normally only available to service workers with the phrase ‘I’ve only got three more years, we gotta make ’em good.’”
Recently, her parents asked Jane to go on a plane with the OP as she’s never been on a plane alone before. The plan was that Jane would go with her and then go back home while the OP went to visit family and she would fly alone afterward. As a thank you, the OP’s parents gifted Jane some skincare products and paid for her tickets.
She wrote, “On the flight, [Jane] stretched out her knees and legs onto the seat in front of us. When the person understandably turned around to complain, she used the stupid excuse about the three years to live thing again. The person said they were sorry about that but to please put her legs in her own space.
“She kicked her legs around a bit and then put them so her knees were resting on the back of the seat in front of us. I told her she was acting childish and she said that she deserve to be comfortable in her last years of life. I then told her that me and others around her don’t care about her living life to the fullest at the expense of others,” the user continued.
The OP explained that her cousin was quiet the rest of the flight and felt bad about what she said, but was tired of Jane “being a jerk” to strangers.
Newsweek reached out to u/OrneryEntrepreneur90 for comment.
Terminal vs. treatable cancers
As defined by the National Cancer Institute, cancer is a disease in which some of the body’s cells grow uncontrollably and spread to other parts of the body and can begin anywhere. What are the differences between terminal and treatable cancers?
Terminal cancer can’t be treated or cured, according to Healthline. However, chemotherapy or radiation can potentially help extend the person’s life expectancy.
Treatable cancers can go away with the right treatment and are not expected to return, via the American Cancer Society. However, doctors can not guarantee that cancer will not come back.
According to verywellhealth.com, the top five deadliest cancers are lung, colorectal, breast, pancreatic and prostate. Surviving cancer depends on the type of cancer a person has, the stage of cancer and the treatment one receives.
“[Not the a**hole],” u/Musical85 explained, receiving the top comment of over 17,000 upvotes, “I am terminal, with about a year, but I don’t act entitled to anything. When I am feeling down/my emotions run high, I spend time by myself, so as to not offend anyone else. I am thankful for every single moment and am living life to the fullest, but not at the expense of others.”
“[Not the a**hole]. Like you said, you could’ve phrased it nicer, but she needed a wakeup call that ‘I’m dying’ is never an excuse to treat others poorly,” u/AllKindsOfCritters wrote.
“[No a**holes here] but hear me out,” u/LonerWitch__me began, “Your cousin is possibly throwing a tantrum in her own way because of how unfair life turned out for her…being told you just have some time left on planet…she must be scared s**tless and acting in this way to just feel something?”
“You’re definitely not the a**hole but I guess right now you both need to sit and talk your heart out, she needs it and maybe you do too. Express your thoughts as calmly as you can and see if you can get her some support from fam and friends to help her with this emotional turmoil,” the commenter continued.
“[Your parents are the a**holes] What on Earth are they doing taking advantage of Jane, a sick woman, to essentially do their role. Jane should have never been there in the first place… I’m so angry with them,” u/Experience-Cool exclaimed.
“Of course [you’re the a**hole]. You don’t have to tolerate every shitty behaviour from her, but there were lots of ways to make your point without telling her that NOBODY CARES THAT SHE’S DYING,” admitted u/mulkimchi.