Online commenters applauded a man who said in a now-viral post that he made his brother cry at his niece’s birthday party.
Posting in Reddit’s “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) forum on u/NieceFirstBdayAITA, the man said he called his brother a “disgusting, gross man” before leaving the party. The post has garnered over 12,800 upvotes and hundreds of comments from supportive Redditors who said the man was right to confront his “misogynistic” brother during the party.
The Birthday Party
At the beginning of his post, u/NieceFirstBdayAITA said he isn’t close with his brother, Paul.
“We have very different worldviews and have incompatible personalities…I would never consider him a friend,” he wrote.
The poster said Paul and his wife Lisa have a daughter who recently turned 1, so they invited their families over to celebrate. Despite not being very close, u/NieceFirstBdayAITA and his girlfriend Amy decided to attend.
“Amy and I arrived a little earlier than we were supposed to and instead of waiting in the car, we decided to go in…When [Paul] saw Amy, he immediately handed the baby over to her and got a beer [and sat] down,” he wrote, adding that Lisa was “frantically” trying to get the house ready.
“Eventually Amy, Lisa and I finished everything. The house was clean, the food was ready, and Lisa looked ready to host a big gathering,” he continued.
Things calmed down once the rest of the family arrived, but Paul eventually got drunk and started venting to his brother about Lisa.
“He was complaining about how pregnancy ‘ruined’ Lisa’s body and how a baby ruined his life,” u/NieceFirstBdayAITA said. “He was complaining to me about his sex life, or lack thereof, and commenting on how desperately he wanted to have sex with someone ‘fit like Amy.’”
Feeling “uncomfortable,” u/NieceFirstBdayAITA and Amy decided to leave. But before they walked out, u/NieceFirstBdayAITA called Paul a “disgusting, gross man who needs some f**king help.”
“Apparently, this made him super upset and he started wailing at the party,” he concluded. “He got over it quickly, but a few people told me I was wrong to shame a father on his child’s birthday…AITA?”
Venting About a Spouse
Some experts say complaining to other “partnered people” about a spouse can have psychological benefits.
“It’s not easy to be in a couple, and b**ching about little things to other partnered people is probably a good way to let off steam,” psychologist Aline Zoldbrod, Ph.D. told Fatherly. “No one is perfect, and getting social support and validation for the stresses of staying in a relationship past the lust stage is going to make life feel better.”
Psychologist and author Holly Parker, Ph.D. added that even “happy couples” complain about each other. However, these complaints tend to be specific and event-related, and have nothing to do with the other person’s character.
“In other words, there’s a difference between complaining that when you were cooking for a huge dinner party, you were annoyed when your wife forgot to pick up the most important ingredient you needed, and saying, ‘She is so airheaded and inconsiderate, it drives me f**king crazy,’” Fatherly said.
Redditors said Paul’s complaints were flat-out “disgusting” and applauded u/NieceFirstBdayAITA for confronting him.
“NTA. Poor Lisa sounds like she has two babies to deal with. Glad you called out your brother…call him out when he is sober,” u/Puzzleheaded-Big1680 said.
“If he didn’t want to be called gross and disgusting, he shouldn’t behave [in a] gross and disgusting [way],” u/sterrendei commented.
Redditor u/kitten097 added: “The brother does truly seem like a misogynistic a**hole. Sounds disgusting just from the way [he] interacts with his wife, how he makes uncomfortable comments, and overall how he talks about his wife.”
Newsweek reached out to u/NieceFirstBdayAITA for comment.
Other Viral ‘AITA’ Posts
On Monday, Redditors urged a bride-to-be to uninvite her family from her wedding.
Last week, commenters bashed a “jealous” wife for forcing her husband to take an IQ test. Also last week, a man received viral support for blowing up at his partner’s pregnancy announcement because he thought it was a prank.